It was never easy to maintain this blog with more time being taken away for other stuffs. However, I find it a necessity for me to continue blogging. Not just sharing my life experiences and all, but as a form of freedom of expression. Sometimes its hard to express your feelings and thoughts freely without inducing some judgement and prejudice from others (Facebook, hint hint!). Moreover, there are some things in life you just have to keep it to yourself, as more often than not the truth hurts.
The recent weeks have been once again bitter-sweet due to the pressure at work and the continuous worry at home. Work have turned troublesome as accusations started flying around about a lost temperature gun used by a runner in a cinema (Runners are people who maintain the halls FYI). And the evidence are pointing to me. Initially I remembered lending my manager the gun during my shift and I really don't remember getting it back. However, they somehow got a footage from the CCTV showing that I still had the gun with me thereafter and went into one of the halls with it, only to emerge out without the gun in hand. Hence, they wanted me to replace the gun using my own pay. Then again, I did not see the footage with my own eyes so I was still adamant that I could find the gun back or, if it's really lost, find out who lost it (maybe it's a sabotage..) and where it's lost. So the predicament I'm facing could only be resolved later when the senior manager, Saha, comes by to review the tapes and calls Hamzah, the duty manager to the stand. Apart from this fiasco, my work life have been somewhat interesting and fun, especially when pay day comes!
Apart from work, there are other things to expect. Recently, I've finally got my enlistment letter from CMPB, stating that I would be undergoing a 13 week BMT training at the SCDF camp at Jalan Bahar, on June 12. This partly came as a shock to me as almost none of my friends are posted to SCDF and instead they are posted to the Police or the Army. This is because normally a JC student would not be posted to anywhere else other than those two. But then again, it could be a good thing as according to some of my friends, SCDF's training is less strenuous and more slack. Moreover, it could provide me with the opportunity to exact my revenge by taking another shot on the A' levels again, if my field instructor (or we call him Encik) is lenient and allows me to study in camp.
It's interesting to know how much the people have progressed within a few months. That's what I've got to know during my recent reunion with the guys from Zen gifts. Although quite a number could not make it due to various reasons, we had a lot of fun at Northpoint dining and catching up. Lina looks really good in her dress, as usual, but I dared not to compliment about her even further on that day. And as for Daryl and William , we had a lot of laughs throughout the whole day. It's a pity though that I was not a fan of photos but had I've been photogenic, I would have taken a lot of photos together with everyone myself. There was that plan to go ice-skating with the guys someday and I hope it's before my enlistment in June. I'd really want to catch up with them again soon.
A thing that has been intriguing me is the fact that my university admission letter still didn't come. This is coupled with the fact that most of my peers had actually got their uni posting results and was assigned to a course that they are most likely to accept. As for me, the agonising wait continues while people like Ni'mah, Matt, Amirul, Thiru, Gilbert, Harith and the many others jump for joy at their acceptance letter. Sometimes I can't help but think how much I screwed myself up all the time. It's clear that I may had so much potential whether it comes to studies from the results I get from the previous N' and O' levels. But somewhere along the line I screwed up badly, and this is where I've landed. Unless I do something about it, really, there is no way of turning back and salvage what's lost 2 years ago. The Comeback King has died..
It's beyond the endgame and there's nothing much I can do about it. I'd pray for redemption but until I find myself once again for good, there can be little hope for miracles from the One. Somehow I dreamed, and wished for a greater future for all of us but the road to it is still bleak and plagued with obstacles and challenges. And in the end, I just want to still be me, even if the world around me changes.. <3
Most of my time had been spent at work, leaving me less time for myself and my family. Somehow. I've decided to blog at my workplace (yes, it's legit for now). Although it may be really troublesome to type on a touch-screen phone but it seems like I have not much of an option.
So far, all the applications for university had been finalised, including the fees taken care off and the appraisal form sent out and cleared by Mr Zee. So it's all now down to the nervous waiting period until the results is made known to me. It's obvious that there is a probability that I may be rejected the first time and I have to appeal to get in. The situation is still tricky with NS enlistment coming up and the deadline of the SEAB exam fees, May 31, drawing close. While that was done, lots of things are happening at work and back at home. Like a dejavu from the past, it was never too easy to amalgamate back into the trends of society (not that all of such trends are morally correct) and society itself. Not that I've done some crime or did time behind bars, but the "free spirited" society cared more about popularity and swag than conventional good heartedness these days. Well, not everyone in my staff are hard to communicate with. I've made a fair share of good friends and colleagues that I could hang out with and I've truly appreciate that altogether.
Apart from work, I've took some time off to catch up with the others. My recent meet up with Daryl at CCK 2 days ago saw him talking about his experience in NS and how he's surviving in there. Earlier in the month, after much of hesitation, I've met up with Zura to pass her a birthday gift. Somehow I thought I felt something for her but I don't want to make "that" same mistake again. Once again, I would rather treasure a close friendship than losing it because of some warm fuzzy feeling inside, even if it means that I'm friendzoned or forever alone (The same goes to Lina). Speaking of which, the whole Zen crew are meeting up this Sunday to catch up and have some laughs. I do hope that I could see William, Sarah, Lina and the other guys once again on Sunday. Working with them had been a blast of an experience, although it was for a few weeks. Meeting up with Ben after some time for pool had been fun and refreshing. I'm happy to know that he's doing well these days. In fact, I'm meeting him up again today before work for some ice-skating together with Kevin at JCube. And finally the BBQ at Swan's place for his upcoming birthday. The whole gang was there including Kapilan, Landson, Hidayat, Sam, Matt. Yup, that was a whole lot of a blast. Sometimes it's nice to know that you're appreciated and it'll boost your confidence to venture out into uncharted territories, feelings that you have never felt before.
Yes, there's nothing much really to talk about these days. Sometimes the thoughts come and go and it's hard to capture everything into a blog post. But somehow I've promised to relate my life experiences here for anyone. Maybe someday, I'll look back and see this blog and be reminded of the great things that had happen before and the hard lessons that I've learnt throughout these years.. <3
It was never easy to maintain this blog with more time being taken away for other stuffs. However, I find it a necessity for me to continue blogging. Not just sharing my life experiences and all, but as a form of freedom of expression. Sometimes its hard to express your feelings and thoughts freely without inducing some judgement and prejudice from others (Facebook, hint hint!). Moreover, there are some things in life you just have to keep it to yourself, as more often than not the truth hurts.
A thing that has been intriguing me is the fact that my university admission letter still didn't come. This is coupled with the fact that most of my peers had actually got their uni posting results and was assigned to a course that they are most likely to accept. As for me, the agonising wait continues while people like Ni'mah, Matt, Amirul, Thiru, Gilbert, Harith and the many others jump for joy at their acceptance letter. Sometimes I can't help but think how much I screwed myself up all the time. It's clear that I may had so much potential whether it comes to studies from the results I get from the previous N' and O' levels. But somewhere along the line I screwed up badly, and this is where I've landed. Unless I do something about it, really, there is no way of turning back and salvage what's lost 2 years ago. The Comeback King has died..
