The Difference

   Why do we stop dreaming and trying as we get older? Why do some people looked at the world with full of optimism while the others turned away in disdain? It's all because of a difference. These people have that ability to stand out from the crowd (in a positive way and not a weird way). It's all about that persona that will draw people to you, making it easier for you to persuade them and sway them in your direction. Some may have it, and some may not. The truth is, however, it can be learnt.

   The topic came out once again when I was down and needed someone to talk to. I was sure that Ben was busy so I was resorting to going back home and chill out with a movie after an arduous 3 hours of tuition. Yet, he then told me that he was somehow free later in the evening. I was still contemplating about many things - My uni placings, my possible life and whether I've truly changed. Somehow during dinner that night, the topic about Ben and his love interest, Angel, slowly diverge into a talk about my "work in progress" life. I remembered that brief chat with Rick that morning in camp and I was relating it to him.

   "I don't understand you. Let me be honest with you. Maybe the reason why you're not attached is because you think that you're bloody handsome. You are so picky in the girls that you want. If you are finding for that girl who doesn't do the vices, like smoking, drinking etc., then might as well you get out there and find a conservative girl that wears a Tudung. Your expectations are too high man..."

   I have to admit that I was pissed when he said that. But it's true. I am picky with the girls that I'm interested in. I was ditching Ruzia back then just because she smokes. I couldn't accept YY when she was such a bimbo around guys. I was judging Nicole secretively just because she had a tattoo, smokes and drinks. I was so anal with this kind of things that little did I realise that I was being judgemental myself. I was so sure that I'm the last person that would judge someone just from face value but I was wrong. I had always been wanting a girl who is tall, pretty, funny, who understands me and will stay with me both in good times and bad, who doesn't smoke or drink or had tattoos, and not to mention still single. When I look back at this previous sentence, it really does seems impossible to find a girl like that in Singapore, unless I was finding a conservative girl like what Rick mentioned.

   There is a more pressing issue though. I may have changed, but I need to do much better if I want to influence others. This includes if I want to pull others, including girls, into my social sphere. Ben's words and experiences at RP made me look back at the people I know - Hilmy, Ashraff, Khalil, Chun Kiat, Rick, Scott etc. So what does these guys have in common?

   


   Paradoxically, the things that they have in common is actually their differences. It's what set them apart from the crowd (as I mentioned earlier). Let's see :-

Hilmy - Leadership qualities ;
Ashraff - Sketching and Design ;
Khalil - Photography (and dressing skills) ;
Chun Kiat - Ability to pick up girls ;
Rick - Photography ;
Scott - Travelling guy
   
   So, this means that I must find that one thing that sets me apart from everyone else. Ben did mentioned that Toastmasters will help me in this one but that would mean that I have to wait a little while longer. Yet that's not it. "What is that one things that I have that any of you don't have?"

   When I think of it, it could be Geography. I kept thinking and talking about it. I was busy explaining to William about how the heritage in inner cities was being preserved by creating places like that Strangers Reunion Cafè. I was always checking the net to find some way, any way, to get into Earth Science. I would tweet about things like earthquakes and coastal improvements. My wallpaper has always been natural wonders like volcanoes and hurricanes. I was elated to teach Pradip, my tutee, every time that lesson was Geography. It felt like everything is intricately related to Geography and naturally to Him.

   And so maybe I should try expanding this "equation" further. Maybe I could be a traveller like Scott? Maybe I should do unique sports and activities that is somehow related to my geographical interest? Or I could expand this blog itself to become a food blog, since I loved travelling to try out foods around Singapore? Either way, if I'm really keen on turning the tides on how people see me, I've to embark on a journey of self-discovery to find what truly makes me different and interesting. ^.^